I'm A Poser

So, I haven't quit my stupid ass cleaning job yet. The plan was to do it July 1st and start filling my time with joyful wonderful fun activities and then share with you guys about how filling my time with joy is making good things happen for me, and how all the things that I want are coming to me, because I'm focusing on joy. Then I postponed it to, I'll quit at the end of the summer, thinking, okay THEN I'll be in a better place, a better vibrational place to quit my job (Law Of Attraction says that we are more vibrational than we are physical). WHAT THE F AM I WAITING FOR? I mean for cripes sakes, my whole post yesterday was about lining up with what want! I'm sorry I'm shouting at you, but it's me I'm shouting at. I'm all, (please, while reading the following quotes use an annoying, whinny voice in your head) "line up with it" and "if you line up with what you want, everything will be okay...blah, blah, blah". What a freaking poser I am! Here I am writing a blog about how I'm gonna quit my job and live more joyfully and I haven't done it yet, because I'm scared.

Yes, it's true, I have been working on doing more joyful things. AND I've been working on choosing better feeling thoughts and yes I've been trying to focus my way into getting things that I believe will make me happier (house, money, a robot dolphin, etc). But again, the ONE thing, the BIG thing, the REASON for this whole Year Of Living Joyously blog was about quitting my job, the job that takes up much of my time and energy, the job I don't necessarily enjoy (sometimes it's okay, I try to be Zen about it) and start doing things that make me feel good instead (writing, hiking, performing, riding robot dolphins,etc.).

I'm scared. Today I have two cleaning jobs and although I'm appreciative for the money, but it's not how I want to make my money or spend my time. And I truly do feel that as long as I hold myself in this place, the place where I think I need to work a job I don't enjoy to make a living, then the things I want won't come to me.  So I'm making a pledge to myself and to you, I will quit my job this Sunday at 1 pm (after cleaning Mike's place, he's sweet, I don't want to leave him in the lurch). Then Sunday at 2pm, Chip and I are going to drive to wine country and go wine tasting, because THAT kinda shit makes me happy.